Here are this episode’s Action Points:

Breathe — Find a “count” that works for you (Kenton uses 5 seconds in, 5 seconds out), and whenever you realize you are feeling stress, anxiety, or resistance, stop and take some breaths. Decide on the number before-hand, do your count, and really soften into the experience. This is a proven way to relax your sympathetic nervous system.

Day of Silence — Choose an amount of time (an hour, a day . . .) and commit to silence for the entire time. This is especially powerful if you are around other people who you often try to control in some way. It allows us to notice very directly when we attempt to control someone, because we’ll have a strong urge to use our voice to try to exert that control. A POWERFUL practice!

Who Knows What is Good or Bad — This Zen Tale is a powerful reminder of how the world might not be quite the way we think it is, and how even “bad” things may be good. This can release us from needing to have the world always look “just so”. Here’s a version of the old story :

An old farmer had a strong horse that he used to plow his fields. One day, the horse broke through the fence and was gone. His neighbor came over and said, “How awful! How will you make it? I’m so sorry for you!” But the old farmer just said, “Who knows what is good or bad?”

The next day the farmer’s horse returned. It had found some wild horses and brought them back. The horses ran into the fence and the farmer’s son sealed them in. The neighbor came over with a huge smile on his face. “What good fortune! You’re the luckiest man on the planet! I’m so happy for you!” But the old farmer just said, “Who knows what is good or bad?”

The day after that, the farmer’s son was trying to ride one of the wild horses, was bucked off, and broke his leg. The neighbor came over in a state of despair. “Oh no! Those horses were a terrible thing after all! How will you ever make ends meet without your son to help you? This is terrible!!” But the old farmer just said, “Who knows what is good or bad?”

The following day, the army came through town conscripting young men for a terrible battle that was being waged against a distant land. The officials took one look at the farmer’s son and passed him by due to his injury. The neighbor came over to congratulate the farmer. “What luck! Your son will not have to go to war thanks to that horse!” But the old farmer just said, “Who knows what is good or bad?”

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Love, Kenton and Rebecca =)